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Subscribe to RSSIn a tight job market, it pays to make yourself memorable -- as long as you are creating a good memory.
The job search site CareerBuilder recently asked 2,500 employers to list their most memorable resume mistakes.
The examples are mostly hilarious, unless you were the person who actually thought you’d get a job with these tactics.
Missteps included:
- Putting God as a reference (no phone number)
- Sending a 24-page resume
- Including an e-mail address with the words “lovesbeer” in it
- Listing “Master of Time and Universe” under experience
With nearly five jobseekers available for every job opening these days, it does pay to make your resume stand out, and quickly. The CareerBuilder survey found that human resources managers typically review no more than 25 applications for every open position, and by review we mean “glance briefly at.”
The survey found that 38 percent of employers say they spend less than a minute looking at each resume, on average, and 18 percent spend less than 30 seconds.
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It is not as mandatory as it seems that one is exclusively dependant on the so called "JOB MARKET" or FICO scores as there are plenty of folks out there that live very well outside these so called constraints. The term we use for these folks is entrepreneur. The other term might be "Judgement Proof." They see something outside the mainstream of hyperbole and JUMP. Historically, this is a class of people from many walks of life from the poor and uneducated to the rich and powerful who rely (depend) on their gut (insight) they relish the game of risk taking and even some have mastered the illusions and the game with the same relish. You won't find these folks living the paycheck to paycheck syndrome, they know there is plenty out there as the planet is rich in resources. That greatest potential initial resource has always been located between the ears as is its opposite.
@Carl Johnson - Yes, those people you refer to are called "stoners" and often live in subsidized housing, or under a bridge. Really successful there.
Yeah, it's more like welfare check to welfare check syndrome!
you are a moron. Im a stoner and i make over $500,000 a yr.
and you forgot "liar" fester0420.
@Sean
not true, actually. Pretty much every big business you see these days started as a small business. That small business was created by a person, or sometimes a group of people. These people were sometimes very very very poor. But they had an idea, a passion, and they were smart, and they became very successful with it. Andrew Carnegie was born into poverty, but when he died he was worth $298.3 billion in 2007 dollars. He was an immigrant who worked as a factory worker. You'll find many similar stories about many of the other richest people around the world. Even look at those who inherit their wealth. What did their parents do to earn that wealth? They were entrepreneurs, and because they were so successful, they were able to assure that their children would live prosperously.
This is off topic but I would like to point something out. Wealth (whether inherited or aquired) does not assure prosperity.
"..and because they were so successful, they were able to assure that their children would live prosperously."
Nope. "Prosperously" is in the eye of the beholder. And some trust fund babies/'rich" emtrepreneurs blow it all and then don't have any way of taking care of themselves!
What you need to stand out is your cover letter. If that's all the HR people are reading these days, then you need to have something that will grab their attention right off the bat.
Yes, every large corporation in America today started as a small business. Did you think large corporations just grew on trees? Research any company like Microsoft, Disney, or Bank of America and you'll find that they started as a "mom and pop" operation somewhere.
AT&T started off with two employees...Alexander Graham Bell and Thomas Watson.
HR Managers typically review only 25 resumes for each job? What a joke. It is all done by computers and HR managers are only processing clerks these days. Don't insult us by trying to make the case that this type of resume or that will get you through the door. Almost all decisions these days are made on who you know. There are simply not enough jobs out there to even justify having HR managers anymore!
For the record, hiring people isn't the only thing HR managers do.
Houston Veteran. That is incorrect. HR Managers/Recruiters do in fact read resumes. I wish it were that easy. Computers help find keywords on resumes so we can narrow down the ones we read. It is a tool, not a problem solver. Computers can find keywords, but not context, length of experience, etc. For example, if I am looking for an IT person, keywords PeopleSoft HR/PY may give me several resumes, but most of them will not have what I am looking for. I have to read those resumes in order to determine the context in which the skills I am looking for are used, how recent the use is, job history, etc. We also notice things like grammar errors, poor formatting, job hopping, etc. Your resume is important.
A poorly written resume and cover letter are an indication of what kind of employee you will be. If you don't care enough to make sure that your resume is error free and properly showcases your education and professional experience...what makes you think that a HR manager or an employer is going to give it or you any consideration for scheduling an interview? If you don't do a good job selling yourself and preparing your credentials and application materials...that tells potential employers that you'll do the same shoddy job for them. Result...no hire.
@HoustonVeteran, you are right about many decisions being made on who you know. That's true. You might not be qualified but if you know the right person(s) AND have the ability to do the job, you're in.
7 deleted, cheap ugg boots banned, spamming...Uggs.
to dee dub's comment if you know the right person and can DO the job you are in. It's a truth that having someone open the door for you is a PLUS...and yes YOU DO have to be able to perform... there is a criteria for employers considering someone: 'you know the job to be done' 'you can do it' (it's not just words in a resume, you CAN do it and you articulate that at interview) you are self motivated (this too must be spoken of, how you 'rose' in your work life and WHY) AND you are not a loose cannon (ie: doing what IS NOT you job, taking on any old thing just to do - DON'T YES 'EM too much because this is A TEST of the business world. THEY DON'T WANT SOMEONE WHO DOES EVERYTHING...in a scarce work environment. IT GETS THOSE there 'nervous'... When they start piling on extra duties...ASK (TALK) it's the one time we can open our lips...ASK what the criteria was for the additional responsibility being given and how you will effect the BIG PICTURE of your working there 5 years from now. (if the new task has BROAD VIEW they respect you, if they are just piling the work on to see if you are a LOOSE CANNON who will just DO ANYTHING... without real thought ...THEY WON'T RESPECT YOU and in short order THEY WILL TRUMP SOMETHING UP to OUST YOU ...ESPECIALLY IF THE TIMES ARE SLOW...
Be careful of HOW YOU TAKE EXTRA ... 'they' watch everything... leave some work FOR THE OTHER.
It's tricky... you would think being compliant is WANTED...but 'they trick' ... YOU NEED TO ACCEPT in the moment but ASK courteously the reason for the extra and where it is leading the dept. Don't windex the windows if they ask... when you can state, "is this for the moment to 'help out' our mainentance guy?" (humorous example)
cant do that for mythological creature
As was noted - some commenters are actually pretty accurate about the "who you know". Jobs (75% of them, approx) are gotten through networking, because we humans tend to trust people who we know, or, who are recommended by people we have confidence in. It's not a nefarious scheme to rob anyone of a job, but just a desire by hiring managers to find someone that both qualifies (skills, knowledge) and is a good match with the team (creative, productive, reliable, works well with others etc). So, it's important to get out there and start talking - to neighbors, friends, spouses of friends, old school buddies - and have a positive attitude.
The article is funny. The comment thread is pathetic. Shut up. (It's not everyone; you know who you are - the people who feel they should have written the article.) And someone please stab the @$$ spamming about ugg[ly boots].
Of course, the secret is the cover letter, addressed by name to the correct person. First, understand exactly what they are looking for, and state that you are it in as few succinct words as possible. Use good quality bond paper and a clear, bold font. (not too small, not too large, nothing with curliques)) Do not misspell, do not use caps for emphasis, employ proper grammar, include no familiarity. Be brief, terse, concise. The work history should include only relevant jobs if possible: if not, pick the closest match. Triple space the history, and use a slightly larger font to make it easily readable. (skimmed) Your references should be checkable, and should be career related or education related, not parole officers or neighbors who sell dope. If possible, deliver the resume by hand to the proper office (while well-dressed), and leave. If not, both e-mail and snail-mail it.
Another trick is to take your time with your cover letter and your resume. Write them, then leave it for a day. The next day re-read the cover letter or have a friend (even better) read your cover letter out loud. Reading out loud, ensures you hear the actual words your wrote and the pauses needed; which relates directly to spelling and grammar. Also your grammar, spelling and your logic errors will stand out like a sore thumb ;-) Also the KISS principle is best... Keep It Simple Stupid...
Oh, and arrange to date the boss's daughter if possible.
I received a resume by email a couple of weeks ago...I am not lying when I say it was 112 pages long! It was deleted...
Don't know if the book's still around. But, "What Color Is Your Parachute" was wonderful for me. Taught me quite a bit. In summary:
1. Think like the boss you want to hire you, and figure a way to demonstrate to him that you can and WANT to do the job. Most folks will give an edge to someone they believe wants to do the job and is not just looking for a job. It'll make sense if you think like the guy/gal doing the hiring. Someone that wants to do the specfic job is probably going to do a better job than someone who is looking for any job.
2. We ALL have something about us that we feel makes us unqualified to be employed. Get over it, none of us are perfect.
3. The typical job search is summarized as: No, No, No, No, No, No, No, No, No....No, No, YES. Hang in there and don't take no's as discouraging or as personal assessments. Keep plugging on.
I got my current full-time, permanent job by getting in as a temp first and proving myself. Takes a while but is worth the effort.